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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26159638">Where’s the Logic in Feeling?</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inkribbon796/pseuds/Inkribbon796'>Inkribbon796</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Masks and Maladies [91]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Sanders Sides (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Feels, Discussion of PTSD, Logan Has PTSD, Logic | Logan Sanders Angst, Logic | Logan Sanders Has Issues, M/M, Roman tries his best, superhero au</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 13:07:28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,201</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26159638</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inkribbon796/pseuds/Inkribbon796</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Living together has been difficult. Whether it’s Remus pranking Roman 24/7, or Patton and Janus having silent standoffs in the kitchen after an argument, but all of them would rather take those little wars of attrition than the elephant in the room. Logan isn’t doing well and no one knows how to help.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Anxiety | Virgil/Creativity | Roman/Logic | Logan/Morality | Patton, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Deceit | Janus Sanders</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Masks and Maladies [91]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1538131</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>70</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Where’s the Logic in Feeling?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is a bit of a continuation to to several different a fics, starting with Little Wonders, about the fact that Logan had a near death experience and has not been doing well since.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>    It was late at the Sides’ two-floor apartment, and the day had been relatively uneventful. Except for a small argument in the morning where both Roman and Remus argued about who got to use the bathroom first.</p><p>    But at this point that had become the new routine in the morning and Virgil had taken to applying his own eye shadow in his bedroom with a mirror that had been stolen from Roman to avoid using the same bathroom as the two bickering brothers.</p><p>    Tonight Janus, Remus, Roman, and Patton were playing poker. Virgil was watching them from the couch, watching something on his phone. The cards were a Disney card set that Roman had made, the chips matched the fairytale theme of the cards.</p><p>    Janus smiled as he pushed all his chips in.</p><p>    “There’s no way,” Roman spat at the partially-serpentine Side, clutching his cards a bit too tightly. “You’re not winning another game.”</p><p>    “I have full confidence in my cards,” Janus smiled as Remus pushed all of his remaining chips in with an overeager grin on his face.</p><p>    “I fold,” Patton sighed, tossing his cards down. “My cards are terrible this round.”</p><p>    “There’s no way you have better cards than me,” Roman decided competitively, pushing his chips in, and throwing down his cards which were an ace and a jack. “Two of a kind, there.”</p><p>    Remus held up his two cards which were a six and a nine respectively. “I think I’ve done pretty <em> nice </em> for myself.”</p><p>    “Remus, sweetheart,” Janus reminded gently. “Poker isn’t won with memes.”</p><p>    “Well it should be,” Remus corrected firmly.</p><p>    “Show me the cards, you filthy snake,” Roman demanded, his voice starting to get louder.</p><p>    “Now, kiddo, we shouldn’t call other people names,” Patton reminded.</p><p>    Janus and Roman ignored him, and he tossed down a king and a queen. “Royal flush.”</p><p>    “What?!” Roman shouted angrily.</p><p>    “That means I win,” Janus smiled, sprouting his other arms and started to pull the chips towards him.</p><p>    “You dirty, rotten scoundrel!” Roman shouted, grabbing for the chips as well. “You cheated!”</p><p>    “Kiddo, keep your voice down,” Patton tried to quiet him, glancing towards the stairs.</p><p>    Janus scoffed, “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m an angel.”</p><p>    “A kinky angel,” Remus leaned in.</p><p>    Deceit pushed him away with one of his arms.</p><p>    “Sweet Frank Iero,” Virgil grumbled, “it’s like living in the apartment again.”</p><p>    There was a distinct slamming of a door from upstairs, everyone downstairs froze, and after a couple seconds Logan came down. He looked exhausted, dark circles under his eyes and in his pajamas instead of his typical button up shirt and tie that he wore in his down time.</p><p>    “Lo, did I wake you up?” Roman looked especially apologetic.</p><p>    At first Logan pointedly ignored him, opening up the fridge to grab some Crofters and a spoon, “No, I was already up.”</p><p>    Janus winced at the lie, but didn’t call Logan out on it. They’d all been woken up at one point or another by Logan screaming himself awake in the middle of the night.</p><p>    Quietly, Logan walked back up the stairs, already opening the jar back up and just spooning jam into his mouth.</p><p>    Roman jumped over the table, almost stepping on Remus’s kidney, the rest of the argument with Janus forgotten as Roman scrambled to follow Logan, making sure he made noise so that the logical Side knew that Roman was following him.</p><p>    Logan walked into their bedroom, closing the door behind him. Roman stood outside, unsure how to help Logan. Declarations of love, poetic ballads, and an always faithful sword couldn’t really protect from the thoughts in your own head.</p><p>    Logan was usually the person to help people cope with their problems, so Roman found himself at a complete loss.</p><p>    Taking a deep breath, Roman knocked on the door lightly before walking in. “Lolo?”</p><p>    He opened the door to find Logan at his desk again, an old WWI era camera sitting on Logan’s desk. It was the same camera that Joan had brought into their first apartment and Thomas had been violently split apart into his Sides. The pink mustache sprayed on it was still visible.</p><p>    “Hey, brainiac, I see you dusted out that old relic,” Roman tried to cheer him up.</p><p>    “I was able to do some minor research on this object while I was undercover,” Logan commented, and Roman walked over to sit on the bed, tossing Patton’s old cardigan into their hamper. “Apparently Wil was trying to get rid of some objects without Dark’s notice, and it exchanged hands for a bit until it got into Joan’s possession.”</p><p>    “So why didn’t it activate sooner?” Roman asked.</p><p>    “For all we know it might have, but I have no records of a severe reaction like Thomas’s,” Logan answered. “However my attempts to replicate the incident have resulted in failure.”</p><p>    “Why would you want that? Roman asked, confused.</p><p>    “There is too much I don’t understand about the effects,” Logan answered. “How does the object work? What caused it to activate? Why did it split us into pieces? All I know about the camera is that Wilford sold it to avoid Dark finding out about a lover he was seeing at the time, it didn’t work and I don’t even know if giving it back to Dark and having someone ask would just answer my questions faster.”</p><p>    “Well it probably doesn’t matter,” Roman decided, Logan sighed and gave him a drained, defeated look on his face. “Even if understanding it could reverse it, fusion already does the trick.”</p><p>    Logan seemed to get frustrated, “That answers even fewer of my questions. How can we fuse in the first place? Why fusion in particular and not literally anything else? I am Thomas’s <em> logic </em>  but yet I <em> feel </em> things. I feel joy, and anger . . .”</p><p>    The Side trailed off a bit, clearly frustrated, “I feel things, and I don’t like it.”</p><p>    “Isn’t that what being human is all about?” Roman proclaimed proudly. “Hearing, feeling, experiencing. That’s life!”</p><p>    “I just!” Logan started loudly before his hands flew to his eyes. He took off his glasses. “I am supposed to be Thomas’s <em> logic </em>, but emotions are such metaphorically sticky and confusing things. But I am human now, I feel and hunger, and want things. It confuses me, and I don’t know how to process it anymore.”</p><p>    Roman frowned, “If only your demons were so easy to vanquish, my dear. My sword would draw first blood.”</p><p>    “I’ve been asking Dr. Iplier for assistance,” Logan admitted, cleaning his glasses. “I am, very clearly, out of my area of expertise when it comes to my own emotional state. But finding an impartial psychologist or a therapist is challenging, especially one who will not be at risk of Dark finding them and getting information out of them through theft or bribery.”</p><p>    “I could grab Patton and you could talk to Emile,” Roman offered.</p><p>    Logan chuckled a bit, putting his glasses back on, “I appreciate your willingness to help, but it would not be ethical for Emile to treat me, he would be considered family. Besides, Emile is not an actually licensed therapist.”</p><p>    “Something we should have fixed years ago,” Roman reminded.</p><p>    “I barely had the time to finish Thomas’s schooling,” Logic reminded. “Switching majors so late would have been an ill-thought through decision on my part.”</p><p>    “Sorry I woke you up, I know you need the sleep,” Roman apologized again.</p><p>    “I would have woken up at some other point in the night,” Logan dismissed, and that only made Roman feel worse.</p><p>    “I hope this therapist works out for you,” Roman told him.</p><p>    “In time,” Logan sighed. “The wound has healed and it’s now all in the mind, and my mind is being far from logical.”</p><p>    “That’s not your fault,” Roman reassured, both of them turning when a knock at the door startled Logan, Patton and Virgil walked in.</p><p>    “I know, I have faced viler creatures, been stabbed, shot, poisoned,” Logan sighed. Virgil sat by his feet, silently leaning his head against Logan’s leg supportively.</p><p>    When Logan lowered his arm, Virgil grabbed his hand without hesitation. “I have just been telling Roman that I have plans on seeing a therapist.”</p><p>    Virgil gripped Logan’s hand a bit tighter but didn’t immediately say anything.</p><p>    “Gosh, if there’s anything we can do to help with that, we will,” Patton volunteered.</p><p>    “It got worse?” Virgil asked Logan.</p><p>    “My lack of sleep is hindering my productivity, and it’s damaging my health, exacerbating the situation,” Logan reluctantly admitted. “My research can only take me so far, I just . . . wish it probably wouldn’t involve those pesky emotions.”</p><p>    “I’m glad you’re alive,” Patton told Logan. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there with you.”</p><p>    “Trust me, I would not have wished such odds upon anyone,” Logan reassured. “Not knowing where Orange is concerns me.”</p><p>    “When I find him, I’ll give him a taste of his own medicine,” Virgil promised.</p><p>    Logan considered telling them more about his most recent nightmares, about the knife and the blurry darkness that he was trapped in. He’d been trying to be open about his nightmares, if only so it felt like he wasn’t trapped in his own mind. But it was the same nightmares, the distress and monotony was eating him from the inside-out. Logan felt like he was going in circles every night, his sleep broken into shorter bursts and he felt guilty for waking the others up, but knowing that it wasn’t his fault. He couldn’t control his dreams . . . but knowing that didn’t make them go away. It didn’t keep him from waking up in the middle of the night.</p><p>    Patton let out a surprise little gasp, startling Logan out of his spiraling thoughts. The emotional Side was already walking towards a tray that had been set about two feet from the door was a tray of steaming hot tea mugs full of tea. Each one of their personal mugs, sat on a tray in front of them. Logan could have sworn that Patton and Virgil had not come in with them.</p><p>    “Oh, Roman, how thoughtful,” Patton commented as he walked over to the tray. Virgil was already eyeing the cups suspiciously.</p><p>    “Yeah, no problem,” Roman answered, uncertain.</p><p>    Patton was bringing the tray over and picked up his own mug, taking a sip and instantly going starry eyed. “It’s so delicious, Ro, what flavor is it?”</p><p>    “Uh,” Roman walked over and grabbed his cup, “oh you know, just one I found in the cupboard, looked new.”</p><p>    Virgil let go, grabbing Logan’s cup. He discreetly took a cautious whiff of the tea first, immediately discerning the ingredients and who had made it in seconds, before he took a small sip. His eyes narrowed suspiciously before he said, “It’s lavender.”</p><p>    Patton made a little gasp, drinking down more of the tea, “I’ve never had it before.”</p><p>    Logan frowned at Virgil as the anxious Side grabbed his own mug as well and passed Logan his own mug.</p><p>    “It’s actually pretty good,” Virgil told him.</p><p>    Normally Logan was inclined to believe Virgil’s non anxiety-induced claims, but he was tired, and the strange way Virgil regarded the tea had him on edge. Besides, Logan fancied himself as a pro-tea-and-coffee connoisseur and <em> this </em> , while he couldn’t place the smell, was <em> not </em> lavender. It had an earthy smell that someone had attempted to mask with lemon and peppermint. A sip told him the same, someone had taken a bitter taste and tried to bury the tea in lemon and peppermint, and a bit of sugar.</p><p>    A bit more sugar than Logan preferred.</p><p>    The after affects of the tea led all of them to curl up on the bed, Roman and Patton already asleep, curled up together. Logan and Virgil side-by-side, Logan felt considerably more drowsy than he had been thirty minutes ago.</p><p>    “What actually was in the tea?” Logan yawned.</p><p>    Virgil let out a massive, full yawn. His eyes were closed. “Dee calls it his Knockout Brew: valerian root, lemon, peppermint, and a—”</p><p>    He let out another huge yawn, and curled into Logan’s side, “—spoonful of sugar, or something, yah know? Really . . . helps . . . me . . .”</p><p>    Virgil trailed off, Logan not too far behind him, his tea in particular mixed with something a little extra to make it a bit stronger. They were leftovers from Virgil’s old prescription the anxious Side hadn’t taken with him when he switched teams.</p><p>    The logical Side’s sleep tonight would be mercifully dreamless.</p><p>    Slowly the opened door was softly pulled further open so Janus could sneak in. He started tidying up the room a bit, using his other arms to pick the cups and trays, but stopped when he saw the camera on the table.</p><p>    The deceitful Side hadn’t seen the object in years, and felt the urge to smash the object against the closest hard surface for all the pain and misery it had caused. But a look at Logan sleeping soundly for once, he stopped. Janus didn’t want to chance Logan waking up. So he took the tray and left, his magic ensuring that all four of the <em> “Light Sides” </em> were tucked in.</p><p>    Tomorrow would be another stressful day, but at least for tonight everyone would get a good night’s sleep.</p>
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